GAMERS DECIDE - Alien: Covenant

The Alien Covenant Cast: From First Death To Final Survivors

austinrafter12 — Thu, 31 Aug 2017 06:57:54 +0000

With Alien: Covenant jam-packed full of gruesome deaths, we've decided it's only right to chronicle them one by one, just for you.

The recent release of Ridley Scott’s Alien Covenant has seen quite a bit of dismissal from fans of the franchise, many even going so far to say that Ridley is no longer a Grade-A filmmaker. Whether you love, hate, or are simply apathetic towards the film, it is much more physically bloody and gruesome then it’s predecessor, 2012’s Prometheus, and that makes everyone happy, right?

So, to highlight the gory awesomeness that is Alien: Covenant, we’re going rank the cast from the first death to the last survivors. Major spoilers ahead. Obviously.

15. Captain Jake Branson (James Franco)

First time Franco has played a character who has only hit the bong twice

Playing the husband of lead character Daniels, Jake straight-up gets burned alive in his hyper-sleep chamber mere minutes into the film. Damn you, neutrino blast, causing major damage to the ship and starting a massive electrical fire that kills this handsome man. Damn you. The crew can't get Franco’s hyper-sleep chamber open in time, As the crew struggles to get his hyper-sleep chamber open, the fire begins to envelop Jake before he can even wake up, the scorching flames violently engulfing him in his sleep. I wonder what he was dreaming about? Unicorns?

But did they really have to name his character anything else than James Franco? Couldn’t he just have played himself? This sexy renaissance man could easily invent a time machine, travel to the year 2104, and become captain of the S.S. Covenant in real life. I guess his schedule was pretty booked up already.

14. Ledward – Private Security Officer (Benjamin Rigby)

Nothing's more painful then giving birth through your upper body

Catching the contagion on the surface of Planet 4, he starts wild trippin’ and gets taken to the rover’s med-bay. Once he starts seizing out of control, he gets a back-full of Neomorph Bloodburster goodness once it pierces through the back of his spine, ripping him into pieces. This is why you have to watch your step on a foreign planet, people. Don’t just step on random Neomorph Spores that will inevitably attempt to devour your whole crew. Just keep this in mind for next time.

13. Karine – Biologist (Carmen Ejogo)

"Don't make me stab you, Xenoface!"

The Neomorph Bloodburster that mutilated Ledward immediately turns its focus on Karine. Because she’s sexy? Probably. Nonetheless, it still decides to rip her face apart after the knife she wields as a threat to the creatures seems to do absolutely nothing.

Faris locks Karine in the med-bay for fear of the alien escaping the room, leaving Karine mano a mano with the dripping, red creature, and she never even had a chance in the slightest to win this battle. But was this a quarantine procedure? It’s possible Faris had some disheveled history with Karine and wanted payback. Old high school boyfriend, maybe. If so, this could possibly be the most vicious catfight move in film history.

12. Faris – Pilot (Amy Seimetz)

Sharpshooting is not one of her most proficient skills

Reaping what she sows, Faris gets chased by the same Xenomorph that killed Ledward and Karine. Running her cute ass off to find a weapon, she grabs a shotgun and begins firing at the alien, but it’s too fast and evasive for her amateur shooting skills (worst score in duck hunt) and she accidentally shoots a battery of explosives, blowing her to smithereens, as well as the entire landing rover. Whoops. Didn’t her parents ever tell her not to use shotguns around explosives?

Now, the rest of the crew is stuck on the planet, while the still airborne S.S. Covenant is trapped in a heavy, windstorm above, unable to land rescue them.

11. Hallett – Sergeant Security Officer (Nathaniel Dean)

Even in deep space, Hallett is contractually obligated to adhere to No-Shave November

I don’t know why security officers in this film tend to be some of the most careless. I also don’t understand why there are five of them. Anyways, upon Planet 4, he also catches contact with the Neomorph spores and eventually gives birth to another Xenomorph, exiting through his throat. That’s got to be worse than a C-section.

10. Ankor – Private Security Officer (Alexander England)

Ankor took quite a large pay cut to avoid the No-Shave November clause

Not long after Hallett’s little mishap, the Xenomorph, still on the surface on the planet, hits Ankor with an instant kill to the mouth. This handsome devil didn’t get enough screen time, so we’ll let that face simmer above with an endearing still. As you gaze romantically at the photo, just remember that he died brutally by a horrifying alien creature, and single.

9. Rosenthal – Private Security Officer (Tess Haubrich)

"Never explore an alien temple alone," said her never.

After arriving at the temple, Rosenthal attempts to clean her wounded arm with some water flowing into some sort of sink. Apparently this temple has sinks. The Xenomorph, now fully-grown, is thirsty for a glass of her yummy insides. While washing up, she finally becomes aware of its presence and reaches for her pistol, albeit not quite fast enough. The Xenomorph takes a vampiric bite into her jugular, decapitating her, and we eventually find her blank stare floating lifeless in a bath of a mix of her own blood and probably some of that tainted temple water. Sorry, babe. It’s a horror movie, you should know better never to be alone.

8. Oram – Executive Officer and Chief Science Officer (Billy Crudup)

This is why you never trust an android

Oram receives a classic Alien death treatment: by the Facehugger/Chestburster variety. Upon being lead deeper into the temple by the android, David, who had been living on the planet since the Prometheus crash, David persuades him to glance into a Xenomorph egg that’s near the point of hatching. Either so mesmerized by this novel sight or just having such a low IQ, he decides to peer into the egg and a Facehugger decides to cuddle with his throat, suffocating him unconscious. Moments later, David watches gleefully over Chris as a Chestburster rips through his torso like a Ginsu knife.

7. Cole – Private Security Officer (Uli Latukefu)

"Oh crap," he thought, before the alien pounced on his thoughtful ass.

While attempting to save Lopé from a Facehugger by slicing it open with his knife, its acidic blood spills all over one side of Lopé’s face, leaving him screaming in agony. As Lopé lays on his back, half his face melting away, he notices the Xenomorph up in the rafters and immediately scatters like a little girl.

Cole, on the other hand, is one to many seconds too late to realize they have been being stalked by the vicious creature, and instead of scurrying away like he’d probably hope to, he gets mangled by the Xenomorph as it jumps from the ceiling straight onto him, ripping him into a million bitty pieces.

6. Lopé – Sergeant Chief Security Officer (Demián Bichir)

Another bloody death among the Covenant

Lopé thought he was good. He thought he was safe. Later, however, Daniels and Tennessee find his bloody remains aboard the Covenant. Turns out he wasn’t good or safe. We don’t actually see the live fatality, but I’m sure it wasn’t fun (at least for him). That room’s going to need a massive cleaning crew. Like, German rave cleaning crew massive.

5. / 4. Ricks & Upworth – Unknown/Honeymooners (Jussie Smollett & Callie Hernandez)

That's what you get for showering naked

Shocked she forgot to bring her facewash aboard the ship

No one really knows what the hell this romantic couple was doing aboard the Covenant. Was Upworth a pilot? Was Ricks just her boy toy? Were they there just for the free continental breakfast?

This couple’s fate comes to a close as they enjoy each other’s naked bodies together amongst a steamy shower (isn’t that how we all want to die?). The preying Xenomorph is so disgusted at this amateurish activity that it decides to impale Ricks and mutilate Upworth. The saddest part, though, in my opinion, is not the horrific, painful deaths, but that Ricks had to die with blue balls.

3. Tennessee – Pilot (Danny McBride)

Secretly pissed he now can't share his weed with Captain Branson

Only one of two crew members to make it the end alive (or so we think), Daniels puts him safely into hyper-sleep, and he immediately dreams of hot dogs and wing dings. Was it the cowboy hat that kept him safe throughout this whole ordeal? Probably.

2. Daniels – Crewmember (Katherine Waterson)

This badass looking for vengeance after the alien has killed nearly everyone

With everyone deceased but three, Walter gives aid, helping her into her hyper-sleep chamber to finish the voyage to their destination, Origae-6, like planned. Finally—safe and sound.

As she’s being put under, she realizes that stupid, evil David was actually imitating Walter and had made it aboard the ship, leaving Walter on Planet 4 (dead or alive, we don’t know) and that bad things are possibly to come (I’d put my money on it). Luckily, dreams of her husband James Franco ease her anxieties about the bleak situation that lays ahead.

1. David/Walter – Android (Michael Fassbender)

Pulling the 'ol switcharoo with the American accent, David eventually gets complete control of the Covenant

With Daniels and Tennessee now in hyper-sleep, David has free roam aboard the Covenant. Using David’s security code, he is granted access to “Mother,” the ship’s AI control system, and proceeds to purge two encased Facehugger embryos from his mouth, placing them into cryo-storage. He then signs on as Walter and sends out a distress signal stating that every crewmember but Daniels and Tennessee was killed in the neutrino blast in the beginning of the film, as the ship continues its voyage to Origae-6.

In the theatrical cut, there’s no implicit sign if Walter remains alive or dead on the planet, as the fight scene between David and Walter is left open-ended.

I personally blame Billy Crudup for all this mess, insisting on landing on a planet that wasn’t part of the itinerary of their mission, just for a stupid “rogue transmission.” Or maybe it was James Franco’s fault for having to disintegrate, the jerk. For all we know, it wasn’t the electrical fire at all, but a lit joint that he accidentally dropped in his hyper-sleep chamber. It did look a little foggy in there.

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All the Alien Movies, And Our Rating For Each

austinrafter12 — Thu, 31 Aug 2017 04:04:05 +0000

We rank the main entries in the Alien franchise. Do they all hold up today?

For almost 40 years, the Alien franchise has given us chilling scares, relentless action, intriguing mystery, and a massively deep universe of impressive backstory. We rate the main films in this beloved sci-fi franchise from its birth in the late 70s to the most recent release this year in 2017.

6. Alien (1979)

Alien - HD Trailer | Ridley Scott 1979 Classic

As the commercial towing vessel, the Nostromo, makes its way back to earth, an unknown transmission leads them to planet LV-426, where they investigate its origin. As one crew member gets attacked by a Facehugger Alien and is brought on board against quarantine orders, the entire ship, now off the planet and headed back home, becomes tasty prey once the Xenomorph hatches from the crewmember’s body and is now loose on the ship. They must kill it before it kills them.

Most original films in popular franchises seem to be held to, at the worst, mediocrity. People like originals because they are new, and normally not convoluted. But Alien earns that title of being a great original not from just being first in line, but because it’s so good that it earns the distinction of being sci-fi/horror classic and ahead of its time.

1979 was quite a while ago, but one thing aging has done nicely for Alien is the abundance of mystery surrounding the monster. As we’ll progressively see through the next three Alien films, the amount of visual mystery surrounding the alien continually declines as we get closer to the present. Set design and pacing are great, and at times it feels like we shouldn’t even be there on the ship, almost documentarian. Although there’s hardly character development, (we barely know anything about them the entire film), the story plotting is so insanely good, we neither seem to notice, or if we do, care.

Sci-fi/Horror really doesn’t get any better than this.

Rating: 10/10

5. Aliens (1986)

Aliens HD Trailer (1986)

Set nearly sixty years after the events of the first film, Ripley is persuaded to revisit the planet LV-426 with a military squad after contact with the first human colony on the planet, “Hadley’s Hope,” is lost. Action ensues. Almost everybody dies. The survivors escape and win. Yay! (for now?)

James Cameron takes over the helm this time for one of the most badass sci-fi/action movies of all time. It’s much more action-oriented than its predecessor, but still manages to be pretty frightening. We get to see much more of Ridley’s personality in this one and there is actually character development here, as opposed to the original, where there wasn’t much, if any. And although all the military bro-talk gets near excruciating at times, in 1986 it wasn’t clichéd yet.

This movie feels like a James Cameron movie in the best way. It’s a Hollywood blockbuster with action and heart. I would like a re-release with all the bro-talk removed though, please. Thanks.

Rating: 9/10

4. Alien 3 (1992)

ALIEN 3 Official Trailer (1992)

During hyper-sleep on Ripley’s way back to earth, there’s an electrical fire aboard the ship, and she gets ejected in an escape pod, crash landing right next to an all men’s maximum security backwater prison run by the evil corporation Weyland-Yutani. No! (for now?). There happened to be an alien hiding in the escape pod and now it begins to ravage the prisoners one by one (and there’s a lot of deaths). Apparently this time, the Queen Alien is inside of Ripley, leading her to eventually jump into a lake full of molten led, killing herself along with the Alien inside of her.

This movie is quite disappointing considering how good the previous two films were. Although feeling like a B-movie at times, including some unbearably bad dialogue, the stylistic cinematography and action are actually quite a delight. At the end of the day, the story isn’t awful, but the film as a whole feels even more disfigured than any of the prison inmates’ dead bodies.

Rating: 6/10

3. Alien: Resurrection (1997)

Alien: Resurrection - Official® Trailer [HD]

I thought the wrap-up of Alien 3 was perfect. Everything was wrapped up in a cute little ball. But then they had to untangle that little piece of perfection, because monies. Two-hundred years after Ripley sacrificed herself in Alien 3, they’ve scooped up her blood samples and have been making clones from her DNA mixed with the alien DNA to create something probably not going to be used for the good of mankind. The scientists figure they have everything under control, but these little Xenomorph buggers are smart enough to escape and terrorize the ship, and just like another day at the office, Ripley is able to kill them off and escape back to earth.

Although pretty exciting and fast-paced, it feels so much closer to just another mediocre action movie than anything “Alien.” Again, like Alien 3, I don’t think think the script was bad (Joss Whedon wrote the script and he’s very vocal about his hatred towards the final product), it was still somehow churned into something very one-dimensional and with hardly any scares to boot. My favorite part is simply the alternate ending where we see Ripley and Call stare onward at Paris in ruins, as the earth has essentially been demolished.

Although visually very well put together, if I were to recommend this movie, I’d say just turn off the sound, turn on the subtitles, and clean your apartment. When your wrist gets sore from vacuuming, maybe stare at the TV for a few minutes and then get back to your Dyson.

Rating: 6/10

2. Prometheus (2012)

Prometheus | Official US Trailer | 20th Century FOX

Set thirty years before the original Alien, Peter Weyland funds a scientific expedition to the moon LV-223, where he, along with scientists Shaw and Holloway, aim to find what they call “the Engineers,” believed to be humanity’s creators. After they arrive, they find one of the engineers still alive in a foreign spacecraft, as well as the information that their ship’s course is set for earth and its intention is to destroy it. Why? We’re left to find out.

As the engineer attempts to fly its ship off the moon and towards Earth, Captain Janek sacrifices himself by flying the Prometheus into the engineer’s ship, crashing it back down onto the surface. Shaw then defeats the engineer and takes off in its spacecraft, presumably to the Engineer’s homeland.

Prometheus is the brainiest and most thought-provoking film in the bunch, with a few creeps and some solid action to hold over even those who might have been left a bit perplexed at the end (I personally was). It’s a movie that needs re-watching to say the least. Although not the return to classic Alien and Aliens form that fans wanted, I found it a very refreshing treat, especially after the last two entries.

Rating: 7/10

1. Alien: Covenant (2017)

Alien: Covenant | Official Trailer [HD] | 20th Century FOX

Ten years after Shaw left LV-233, the Weyland-Yutani ship, the USCSS Covenant, is en route to Origae-6 to find another habitable planet for humanization, when it flies through a neutrino blast, killing most of the colonists on board and their captain. After repairing the ship, the remaining crew members receive an unknown transmission, and are required under their work contract to follow the signal to a nearby planet, seemingly even more hospitable to human life than Origae-6 was thought to be. Turns out it isn’t. There are aliens and they kill almost everybody.

The crew finds the android David on the planet, with Shaw having landed there (after Prometheus) and dying. The transmission ruse turned out all along to be just a pit-stop to pick up some more alien swag for Weyland-Yutani. As the final survivors, Daniels, Tennessee and Walter (their non-evil android), escape the planet and begin hyper-sleep, Daniels realizes that David impersonated Walter to get on board the ship, and he puts her into hyper-sleep, before she can stop him. David manning the ship now, it’s back on its way to Origae-6.

While being just as intelligent as its predecessor, Prometheus, Alien: Covenant gives us more gore and more action then Prometheus and it’s fun as hell. The gore is done right. It’s not cringe worthy, it’s just plain frightening. The film’s main problem, however, is that its complexity just comes off as confusing in its first visit, but after multiple views, I enjoy this movie more than I did the first time. Covenant is definitely worth many viewings, and although it’s not too hard to predict the twist at the end, I’m a sucker for a good twist and this was one that I thoroughly enjoyed.

Rating: 7/10

Although the proposed Neill Blomkamp's Alien 5 has been put on definite hiatus, Ridley Scott has stated he has much more in store for the Xenomorphic universe and we can't wait.

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